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Comments (15)
Comments (15)
15. Michael Skeldon
Kayla-
2nd and 3rd draft not in html format.
Last sentence of Scriptwriting journal includes word “rally.†It should be “really.â€
02/25/08, 11:46 am
14. Michael Martins
This draft came out very well. I found maybe two things that i suggested fixing. There just my personal thoughts no vocab corections or anything like that. I can't wait to see how well this movie will come out.
02/13/08, 03:30 pm
13. Michael Martins
I corrected Kayla's secind draft of the script. It realy didn't need that much repair it was just script gramer mostly. The script looks good I hope to see it on the screen soon.
02/01/08, 02:03 pm
12. Michael Martins
This is Michael Martins giving his input on you first draft of your script. We sat down and talked about the basic things I suggested correcting. There wasn’t much for you to fix. I suggested that for the sections of song you wrote in the script be labelled as SONG because they were just random paragraphs in the middle of the page that looked like song lyrics. Also there were a few points wear a character was introduce but the name was not in complete caps. After that there was not much else. I like the story that is being portrayed in the script and I think the audience will under stand it and will be hit emotionally. I have no suggestions story wise because I believe the story is fine. I hope the movie comes out well and I look forward to reading this script again.
01/10/08, 11:23 pm
11. Kyle Schoolcraft
Three paragraphs: I think your capstone is the most personal one. Also, I think by doing it this way will make it a touching film. I don't see any major faults in your paragraphs but try to condense the middle paragraph.
11/09/07, 06:43 pm
10. April Nicholas
Kayla,
I like your paragraphs, and it seems you put a lot of thought into them. I loved how you put detail into every paragraph. Even though you tell us the music in the first paragraph, are you going to have any sound effects or music in the other parts of your film?
11/08/07, 02:22 am
9. April Nicholas
Hi Kayla, How are you? The sentences are good, though they need some work. First, you need to do some rewording....like what is "Her last year..HERE.." describe the word here. Besides that it looks really good.
11/05/07, 02:50 pm
8. Kyle Schoolcraft
Three Sentences:
You have the idea for your capstone and how you want to show it. However, I think you need to add more to that first sentence and I am confused about how you worded the last sentence. I still think this will come out to be a meaningful capstone film.
10/29/07, 05:32 pm
7. Nicollette Forte
This tells just enough to make you want to see the rest of the story, and it seems like a very interesting and personal story. Can't wait to see how it comes out :)
10/17/07, 12:25 am
6. Amber Martin
Your idea seems very interesting and I really can't wait to see the out come, I think that it's going to be very good. Good luck.
10/15/07, 04:58 pm
5. Ashley Gonzalez
I think that this will become a good film cant wait to see it. It is a good idea
10/12/07, 01:45 pm
4. April Nicholas
Kayla, I like how you put some things in there about your dad, I acctualy did not know that happened. Im sorry to hear. So what do you want to do with Marine Biology? What kind of work do you want to do? Are you planning on getting a job before your graduating? I really do like what you are saying in this though. Just those questions pop in my mind.
10/05/07, 01:57 pm
3. Nicole Beaudoin
Wow great job.....That's good that you love to cook.I like waht you say about a culinary student. But maybe you could add more to a Beacon student is.
09/28/07, 06:48 pm
2. Nicole Beaudoin
this is very well thought out. nice job
09/28/07, 02:04 pm
1. Michael Martins
I like it. You are straight and very to the point. However you express what you want the world to know very well. This whole things shops us very well what you think of the school and your self. My question now is does any of it srtike you as a basses for a movie? I think i may see something in not knowing quite yet what you want to do in life after BEACON. Its a great paper.
09/26/07, 06:55 pm
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15. Michael Skeldon
Kayla-
2nd and 3rd draft not in html format.
Last sentence of Scriptwriting journal includes word “rally.†It should be “really.â€
02/25/08, 11:46 am
14. Michael Martins
This draft came out very well. I found maybe two things that i suggested fixing. There just my personal thoughts no vocab corections or anything like that. I can't wait to see how well this movie will come out.
02/13/08, 03:30 pm
13. Michael Martins
I corrected Kayla's secind draft of the script. It realy didn't need that much repair it was just script gramer mostly. The script looks good I hope to see it on the screen soon.
02/01/08, 02:03 pm
12. Michael Martins
This is Michael Martins giving his input on you first draft of your script. We sat down and talked about the basic things I suggested correcting. There wasn’t much for you to fix. I suggested that for the sections of song you wrote in the script be labelled as SONG because they were just random paragraphs in the middle of the page that looked like song lyrics. Also there were a few points wear a character was introduce but the name was not in complete caps. After that there was not much else. I like the story that is being portrayed in the script and I think the audience will under stand it and will be hit emotionally. I have no suggestions story wise because I believe the story is fine. I hope the movie comes out well and I look forward to reading this script again.
01/10/08, 11:23 pm
11. Kyle Schoolcraft
Three paragraphs: I think your capstone is the most personal one. Also, I think by doing it this way will make it a touching film. I don't see any major faults in your paragraphs but try to condense the middle paragraph.
11/09/07, 06:43 pm
10. April Nicholas
Kayla,
I like your paragraphs, and it seems you put a lot of thought into them. I loved how you put detail into every paragraph. Even though you tell us the music in the first paragraph, are you going to have any sound effects or music in the other parts of your film?
11/08/07, 02:22 am
9. April Nicholas
Hi Kayla, How are you? The sentences are good, though they need some work. First, you need to do some rewording....like what is "Her last year..HERE.." describe the word here. Besides that it looks really good.
11/05/07, 02:50 pm
8. Kyle Schoolcraft
Three Sentences:
You have the idea for your capstone and how you want to show it. However, I think you need to add more to that first sentence and I am confused about how you worded the last sentence. I still think this will come out to be a meaningful capstone film.
10/29/07, 05:32 pm
7. Nicollette Forte
This tells just enough to make you want to see the rest of the story, and it seems like a very interesting and personal story. Can't wait to see how it comes out :)
10/17/07, 12:25 am
6. Amber Martin
Your idea seems very interesting and I really can't wait to see the out come, I think that it's going to be very good. Good luck.
10/15/07, 04:58 pm
5. Ashley Gonzalez
I think that this will become a good film cant wait to see it. It is a good idea
10/12/07, 01:45 pm
4. April Nicholas
Kayla, I like how you put some things in there about your dad, I acctualy did not know that happened. Im sorry to hear. So what do you want to do with Marine Biology? What kind of work do you want to do? Are you planning on getting a job before your graduating? I really do like what you are saying in this though. Just those questions pop in my mind.
10/05/07, 01:57 pm
3. Nicole Beaudoin
Wow great job.....That's good that you love to cook.I like waht you say about a culinary student. But maybe you could add more to a Beacon student is.
09/28/07, 06:48 pm
2. Nicole Beaudoin
this is very well thought out. nice job
09/28/07, 02:04 pm
1. Michael Martins
I like it. You are straight and very to the point. However you express what you want the world to know very well. This whole things shops us very well what you think of the school and your self. My question now is does any of it srtike you as a basses for a movie? I think i may see something in not knowing quite yet what you want to do in life after BEACON. Its a great paper.
09/26/07, 06:55 pm